Mean People Suck

We had an incident at work tonight that literally stopped everyone in their tracks... customers and employees. It was about 6:00 and a gentleman came in with a return and to pick up some alterations for his wife. He huffed his way through the door and disgustedly sighed to the desk. Our alterations guy does this stuff on the side and takes checks or cash. One of our ladies tried to explain that to him and his response was "I have a debit card". She then made the huge mistake of using the word "Honey" towards him. He literally BOOMED at her "Lady, DO NOT CALL ME HONEY!!" I have never in my life felt such an atmospheric change of pressure so quickly in a room. It was as if some vortex had come and sucked all the energy in this room away. You could have heard a pin drop. The problem was dealt with and the "gentleman" left.

He did say to the person who stepped in to handle the exchange that his wife was in the hospital. He also made the comment that she was having trouble making decisions. This woman is a regular customer and has always been a strange little bird. The last time she was in (about a week ago) she was more needy than she has ever been and a little more strange. After he left, we speculated about what kind of hospital she was in...that's horrible, but we did. Quite seriously, from his behaviour we wondered if there had not been verbal abuse going on at home...

The guy gets small "by" because his wife is in the hospital and he is probably worried about her. I know that worry comes out in differ ant ways in different people. I can also understand people getting upset by the use of terms of endearment...BUT we mostly deal with women...ALOT of them each day who want to be made feel special. We remember faces but not always names...so sometimes "Honey" comes out in place of a name. I do have to say that that "Honey" is not one I use...mine are "Dolly" (kind of stupid but I don't use that term unless it is someone I know well and STILL can't remember their name but are huggable customers...you have to retail maybe to understand this...and I use the occasional Bebe with the French accent.)...okay, both reprehensible but I am careful my usage because I don't want to offend someone. I know that terms of endearment are tricky. My regular ladies (who tend to be older) I always address as "Miss Insert Their Name Here". I can thank Janet Potter for that. According to Janet, it was okay to address people you didn't know well on a very personal basis by their first names if you addressed them as "Mister" or "Miss"...it was a sign of respect...thank you for people who brought up on the South. Manners always translate.

...but this man went hostile. Seriously, there seemed to be violence in the air...over a word that was said in the best of intentions and in an environment where it is used often...maybe more than it should be...and the worst part is, he WAS embarrassed about his behaviour but never attempted any kind of reconciliation or apology. It was just okay to treat a person he had never met badly.

I have a challenge...it is the holiday season and a season for reflection. We all have struggles, we all have stresses...I don't care what religion or things you believe in...this is a time to be spiritual in whatever way you find that spirituality. It is a time of rebirth..of renewal. My challenge is to go out and be kind. Tomorrow, before you go to sleep, no matter if you have had the crappiest day of your life, ask your self "What was the best thing that happened to me today?"...because there always is a best thing.

My best thing today...Bob stayed home from work because he has bronchitis (not a good thing) but I closed today and we got to sit side by side this morning and drink cofee and watch TV in the middle of the week together. Felt like a snow day....